My Apologies, Matt Damon vs Sarah Palin, Twilight Spoofs

It's been a long time since I posted anything on my blog and I apologise to myself for the temporary setback. I was moving houses (from Wolverhampton to Birmingham) in preparation for my Masters at the University of Birmingham, and when that was done I had to attend the freshers' week (a week set aside for new students) and a lot of lectures. A lot. I mean 5 lectures a day, 5 days a week. I'm presently working on cutting them down, believe me.

One interesting and niggling issue I have always had with packing is how things I thought gone forever pop back from the dead to surprise me with a 'Hey, remember me!' Old Manuscripts (of discarded plots that have since been re-written) jump forth from derelict corners of my room with wide Sylar-esque grins. They've been stalking me, I tell you.

The problem is I can't just chuck them into the bin for fear of someone picking them up and turning them into bestsellers (no, it doesn't matter how badly they were written – look at Twilight; not a very well written book but selling buckets of copies worldwide). I must figure out a way to get rid of them for sure. They are becoming a real pain in the behind, a reminder of how terrible my writing skill was (some would argue it hasn't changed, and some would prefer The Bold and the Beautiful to Prison Break).

Maybe I still have these manuscripts because they mean more to me than I realise. Reminders, whether good or bad, can generally be good. These manuscripts are the product of my hard work at a time when I hadn't a clue what I was doing. I admit, sometimes I glance through them and laugh. It's always pure comedy reading bad writing.

I'll probably keep them anyway.

Back to business, though. Here are some of the posts I should I put up days ago:

 

Matt Damon vs Sarah Palin

Ladies and gentlemen it looks like one of my favourite American actors doesn't like the idea of Sarah Palin as Vice President or President of the United States (the argument here being that McCain will be dead by the end of his first term).

"It's totally absurd and I don't understand why people aren't talking about how absurd it is."

Well Matt, people are talking now.
 

Twilight Spoofs

Trust me when I say you're going to have so much fun watching these videos.

Twilight movie trailer:

 

Breaking Dawn Review as a song:

"I lived on lots of fan-fiction, but if this book was a fan-fiction I would report it for SPAM."

Simply class.

 

In Breaking Dawn's defence:

"Renesme rocks! She's the coolest little girl ever - I want one!"

Oh dear.

This video really frightened me. I had nightmares for four straight nights after watching this for the first time. I propose that the United States government use this video as a torturing device. It would reap fantastic benefits, I promise.

 

Twilight at Comic Con (not a spoof of Twilight):

Fan support for Twilight is insane, you have to agree. But I really hope this movie doesn't tank, because if it does ... if this movie so much as sucks...