For those of you who haven't heard of him, David Blaine is a supposed (??) American magician and endurance artist who holds numerous world records. He has performed many idiotic – I mean – fantastic feats in the past. I'll list them below.
Buried Alive (5 April 1999): Blaine is entombed in a transparent plastic box underneath a 3-ton water-filled tank for seven days.
Frozen in Time (27 November 2000): Blaine is encased in a massive block of ice for 63 hours, 42 minutes and 15 seconds.
Vertigo (22 May 2002): Blaine is lifted onto a 90ft high and 22in wide pillar with the assistance of a crane, and remains there, standing for exactly 35 hours.
Above the Below (5 September 2003): Blaine is sealed inside a transparent Plexiglas case suspended 30ft in the air for 44 days.
Drowned Alive (1 May 2006): Blaine is submerged in an 8ft diameter, water-filled sphere for seven days and seven nights.
Revolution (19 November 2006): Blaine is shackled to a gyroscope rotating at a rate of eight revolutions per minute, hanging above an empty lot in Manhattan.
And his latest daredevil, so-magical-it-astounded-the-whole-world stunt:
Dive of Death (18 September 2008): Blaine is hung upside down without any safety net for 60 hours above Wollman Pink in Central Park.
If you would like to read more about David Blaine, go here
But, amazing magician he is? I think not. If this is what you call magic then I have definitely seen Africans in Sudan and Somalia perform greater, mind-boggling tricks than yours, Mr Blaine.
Want to convince me? How about you get shot, die and come back from the black pits of hell in two days – then I'd be most convinced. Until then, you're just a fraud for the average white man's amusement.
I end this post with a word from the illustrious Stephenie Meyer: laterz!