Wednesday, 27 August 2008

Welcome, Glen Akin

Since there's no one to congratulate me (shake my hand, pop a bottle of champagne, etc) on successfully creating my first blog, I'll do it myself: congratulations Glen Akin, you have done me proud.

I cannot say it was an easy task. The first bit was rather effortless (creating the blog on Blogger), but truth be told I created this blog only because I really wanted to try out the feature in WORD 2007 that gives bloggers the ability to publish write-ups from WORD itself (rather than from the online blog publisher) ... and that's where my train of problems began its journey with one mission in mind: to drive me mad.

I must admit, the initial fault was mine; somehow I had forgotten my password and couldn't seem to register my blog with WORD, but as soon as I realised I was the idiot slowing me down everything was smooth sailing.

Until my ship crashed on a gigantic iceberg and sank faster than the titanic; that is to say, I encountered another maddening crisis – I couldn't upload pictures from WORD to Blogger! I spent the next hour or so raking the internet for a solution and was even more frustrated when I found zilch. Nada. Nothing. One thing I did discover was that this problem has been in existence long before I even knew what blogging was. So my question is why hasn't Microsoft or Google done anything about this?

I was miffed. I even considered abandoning Blogger for Word Press. Pay attention please. The analogy here would be: so, after crashing on that iceberg and sinking my ship to the bottomless ocean of sub-zero doom, I'm freezing my bum off and trying to swim for safety. I see a ship in the distance (that ship is Word Press). I scream as loud as I can – with difficulty, of course – 'Help! Help me!' The sailor aboard the ship spots me. He manoeuvres and approaches. Nearer. Closer.

A meteor drops from the sky and obliterates the ship and her crew right before my eyes (Word Press isn't free – I have to bloody pay to use it!).

Okay, maybe I am being overly dramatic (paying to host a site these days is really cheap, or so I've heard) but I'm a newbie at this! I can't pay now! What if I get bored of blogging? Listen, I don't care if it costs £0.09 to host a blog; it's still money spent, and I spend money wisely. So, there!

Moving on.

I decided to concentrate my efforts on Blogger. Although a lot of bloggers have testified that Blogger is easier to use and a far better choice than Word Press for beginners (such as myself), I still think they (the developers) need to sort out this inability-to-upload-pictures-with-WORD problem, because I'm still swimming around aimlessly in the icy water waiting to be rescued. And my bum is freezing. Trust me when I say it's nothing to write home about. The sooner I get out of this blasted water, the better.

So my plan is this; I'll do my typing in WORD and put up any necessary pictures through Blogger (that's right – all of this, everything you're reading, was typed and published from WORD 2007). And probably in the future (that is if I keep blogging) I'll create different blogs for different stuff: blog for movies, another for books, and then another for sex, etc.

Now, if you'd be so kind to excuse me I'm off to down the champagne bottle sweating buckets of water on my desk and hopefully I'll get drunk, because I never get drunk. I think it's a genetic disorder. Damn my father.

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